I received a lovely message from a friend this morning, I hope she doesn’t mind me sharing it here:
“I’ve stopped breast feeding him now
It’s so much easier as I ask my helper to get the bottle ready at night
But his cot is in my room so I still wake up
And I guess I always want to personally make sure he is ok
It was bittersweet to stop feeding
I felt freedom…
Yet I felt bad not giving him what is best for him
Motherhood has so many emotional challenges
Would never trade it for anything in the world though
It’s really rewarding”
This is a friend who’s son is now 10+ months (I think she’s done pretty well) and I was once on the phone to her while she was sitting in her office bathroom pumping for her son’s next feed…that’s dedication! And yet this amazing mama feels guilty for not being able to breastfeed anymore and for having to go back to work full time.
Mama’s guilt, it affects us all at some point. As mom’s there is so much we feel guilty about – not being able to breastfeed or just formula feeding instead, sitting our children down in front of the television while we make dinner, using disposable nappies instead of switching to cloth, feeding our kids junk food, leaving our child at nursery or with a child minder while we go to work, the list is endless.
So many women also tend to compare themselves to other women and how they raise their kids so we often ask/receive questions like “Is your child sleeping through the night?” or “Oh he eats all his vegetables?” But let me tell you mama, every child is different and every mother too.
So if you’re bombarded with guilt, stop your thought process, kick that lil’ guilt bugger sitting on your shoulder off, stop judging and being so hard on yourself, think of advice you’d give a friend if she was in the same situation feeling guilty and know that whatever you’re doing is the best in your given circumstances. Give yourself credit for who YOU are and what YOU do. And if you still feel the guilt then address it. Look for changes you can make so you feel better about things and see yourself in a new light. A happy mama = a happy baby!
This is a beautiful video to remind us to stop underestimating ourselves.
Have a great weekend everyone!